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Dear Junior,

This is for you my darling nephew, Junior, and of course my dearest sister, Abby. I know this letter is way overdue (I actually decided to go on hiatus and focus on stuff that aid in earning me some money, but I recently realized it’s 2021 and I can no longer put this on hold (besides, money is never enough..yea, we're animals of bad habit). I am gonna share what I am still trying to live by and hope it'll come in handy in one way or the other.

First and foremost, the past 2 years have been somewhat strenuous for us all, and I would like to congratulate each and every one of us for not giving up (..yet). I mean, it’s like a veil got lifted from our eyes and we can attest to the torturous scrutinizing machine that is life. We are older now and we acknowledge that society can only comprehend success as far as material sh*t is involved. I wanna make sure you know that no one gives you the whole picture..ergo, trust the process while hoping each time that that would be your big break. I honestly no longer fathom the meaning of ‘big break’. I mean I don’t believe there’s this one opportunity that you have to grab no matter what for the horror of never getting another. I refuse to believe that our lives have already been written and we’re here to fulfill the prophecy or some kind of fate..hence my point..don’t stop dreaming and making up your own fate.

There will come opportunities that to others calls for immediate acceptance but I pray that if this 'opportunity' doesn’t make you cry tears of joy or make you hold your breath for a minute no less just to savor the moment, then don’t take it. I have been a victim of society's pressure myself..taking that job just because, taking that course just because.. clubbing just because..at some point, everything loses meaning hence the need to take everything with caution..learn to give yourself a second chance while flipping those pages..you’ll be surprised how much you can learn from a single page of a good book..those books that put you in this 'special' headspace of knowledge, for lack of a better wording..the best yet honestly..they transform you big time if you just let them.

Sometimes a book can be like a good friend. You pick it just because there’s something that intrigues you - be it the author, the cover, the title, or the story itself. I recently read 'Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom', an author I have come to admire after also reading 'Tuesdays with Morrie' and 'The Five People You Meet in Heaven' and I can compare the journey taken to having an enticing discussion with joyous and not-so-good moments all wrapped in such a delicate ball of wool, all soft and warm. The story revolves around a request put forward by Mitch’s Rabbi from his childhood, Albert Lewis. Albert asked Mitch one simple question, “Will you do my eulogy?”. And so the story begins. Reading about Albert’s life and faith and Henry’s compassion and tenderness made me revisit my own belief and conviction. I can understand Mitch’s questions because those are the questions that I ask myself – and even though I am firmly planted within my circle of belief, I do find myself wavering from time to time. If at some point you don’t believe in God or think that conversations about faith can be stifling and saccharine, perhaps you should give this book a go.

Junior, I would like to tell you how much I treasure your existence..super proud to be your auntie. I am aware my gift got lost somewhere in this vast world. I wish you the very best in life. I hope you learn early on about the good stuff that life can offer so you can hold onto them for the not-so-good times. I mean you’ve already seen how COVID-19 has had such a major impact on our social life, and a lot more stuff you will come to know of as you grow.

It’s my hope that you maintain the tranquility, something we actually share. Life is definitely gonna be much better for you as of a male gender..not sure when we will all be feminists and live by it, but nonetheless, I’d hope that you take this as a responsibility and make good of it. Be your sister’s keeper always. You may be young age-wise but I’m sure there would be times when Amora will look up to you for advice. I hope when this day comes, you’ll make us proud by offering the best you can give, and for this to be the case, I hope you sought wisdom from reading good books you can find and by taking your parents’ guidance. They know more than you'll ever know, trust me. You’re gonna question their decisions when you’re an adult though, but until then, they’re always right.

Read as many books as possible. Play as much as possible. Finally, Interact as much as possible..this is because you’ll also get to an age where you question the worthiness of every single person in your life and shedding them off, and it’s gonna be hard. Some will be very close family members (could even be me), but I pray that despite this, you’ll still have the same courage to do it than waste precious time holding polite conversations. Never lower your standards because for every action there is a reaction/consequence and trust me, you wouldn’t want to be on the wrong side when this happens..life hits back twice as hard..I still get major migraines from this..I didn’t know better..but this doesn’t really count. Nonetheless, have fun..do the stuff you know will create the best of memories. Choose your crowd well..I mean you don’t have to get everything here right on the first go, but I am hoping you will always have the courage to face the truth, the energy to start over, and the patience to stand by yourself over and over again. With more reading, you avoid lots of confrontations and get other people’s best experiences which if not educative can be quite entertaining or both, I mean what do you have to lose?

In a society where the male gender is still the ruling class, it comes at a price. They have been trained to shy away from showing any emotional vulnerability, birthing an era of very emotionally unstable male adults with a humongous hunger for intimacy that society has robbed them of. I am here to tell you that it’s okay to want intimacy and to be vulnerable with those you trust, we're human after all. Don’t bottle things up. It’s good to talk. If you’re feeling anxious, stressed, sad or worried then reach out to someone. The belief that boys and men shouldn’t show their emotions is damaging. So be brave.

Surround yourself with people that make you feel good about yourself (i know it's cliche and all). Treat others as you wish to be treated (Luke 7:12). Be honest with yourself and with other people. We all make mistakes but lying to cover them up just makes things 100 times worse in the long run. You’re only young once so have fun! But make sure you stay safe. There’s no point in worrying about something that hasn’t happened yet. Enjoy the present. It doesn’t matter if you’re not the cleverest or funniest person in your class just make sure you always do the best you can and be proud of yourself for that. I am sure when you’re all grown you might wonder why we did some stupid sh*t..but I hope you have as much understanding and love to overlook these.

As Adam Smith puts it, ‘The disposition to admire and almost worship the rich and powerful is the great and most universal cause of corruption of our moral sentiments’. But it is the thing that life does to people. It is the thing that time does to the strongest of bonds. It is the thing that distance does to spirits that were once used to each other. It is the thing that we do to ourselves; getting drowned in our own lives, and letting the waters erode our humanity, and then when the guilt and shame of it all starts haunting us, we lay blame on these things; life, time, and distance.

Rancy Chepchirchir